A Prophet in his own country

I prayed recently with the following Scripture passage, Mark 6:1-6:

Going from that district, he went to his home town and his disciples accompanied him.  With the coming of the sabbath he began teaching in the synagogue and most of them were astonished when they heard him.  They said, "Where did the man get all this? What is this wisdom that has been granted him, and these miracles that are worked through him? This is the carpenter, surely, the son of Mary, the brother of James and Joses and Judas and Simon? His sisters, too, are they not here with us?"  And they would not accept him. And Jesus said to them, " A prophet is only despised in his own country, among his own relations and in his own house"; and he could work no miracle there, though he cured a few sick people by laying his hands on them.  He was amazed at their lack of faith.

I first read it trying to identify with Jesus.  I thought about how people react to the things I have to say.  I thought about whether or not people seem to be listening, seem to care.  And for the most part, I haven't run into this problem.  I preach in my home town all the time.  Most of my parishioners know some member of my family or another.  No one is dismissing me or what I have to say.  Maybe they'll start one day, but right now, that's just not the case.

I was stuck.  I didn't know how to respond to this story.  I didn't know what it had to do with me.

Then, the Spirit got to work.  Instead of Jesus, I saw myself in the story as one of the complaining Nazorenes.  I've known Jesus for years.  I've been very familiar with him every since I was a little child.  I know what he has to say, I've heard it a thousand times.

But I never listen.

Or sometimes I listen, but I think, "yeah I'll get around to that sometime.  One day I'll start getting my act together, but not yet.  I've known him since I was a kid.   I've haven't ever really taken him seriously for long, and things aren't so bad.  Why change?"

He was amazed at their lack of faith.

Go further than that:  when Jesus comes to you or me, seeking to dwell in us, to recreate us, he can be said to be visiting his hometown - he fashioned us after all; he knows us better than we know ourselves.  Jesus comes to visit me, to speak to my heart.  He comes to dwell in the abode he has fashioned for himself, but I don't make any room for him.  He's always been around, and always will be, so I'm in no hurry to change - I'll do that later.  I will, I promise, just not right now.

He was amazed at their lack of faith.

My normal mode of taking in the good news of salvation is to focus on the good, rather than be bogged down by judgment (and thanks be to God for that).  However, in all of the radical joy I find in contemplating God's work, I sometimes forget that my own obstinacy and selfishness is in fact directly opposed to his plan.  I don't think he sweats it, because his power to forgive is bigger than my sin, but seriously, I'm pretty good about ignoring his will.  In view of all he has done for me (both what I recognize and what I do not) do I not amaze him with my lack of faith?  Should I not amaze myself as well?